The Latest Endevor of mine

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Vote For Ross!

Hello all you Martha Brown-ians, are you looking for a leader?
Vote for Ross!

Silly Popsicle Stand!

Question: If one wears shoes, polishes shoes, and can eat shoes, SHOULD he eat shoes?
This question needs to be answered. And I cannot live without a destiny. Destiny is, to me, as sweet a sound as a turtle eating a lettuce leaf. It flows though life, consuming all in its way, but only stalling for truth, for liberty. If one is to live without destiny, one has no purpose to die for. Which leads me to say that all people with more facial hair than me should be forced to sing polkas. And let me tell you, I don't want to polka the night away unless I have my trusty accordian. If anyone has an accordian, that is trusty, please inform me. Thanks! But even so, my existance is left shadowed by the towering preasence of the French Emperor, Gustav.
I feel my every move is being watched. I feel my every thought is being listened to. The only thing I have left, to myself, Is today. Today: The day when thoughts become actions; When dreams become reality. Trancending across the world, today is the only universal motive. Which really stinks, due to the inability to travel through time and space. The limit of light travel crushes any hopes to colonize distant worlds, due to its vastness. All hopes of other life in our universe is crushed by this constant peril. At very least, I have my lemonade. That makes me content and happy. Too bad that I don't sell popsicles. Silly Popsicle Stand!

Why Can't I Ever Find My Sock?

This morning, I was eating a delicios bowl of cereal. Oh, and I ate the cereal too. I then noticed that my pet llama was hungry. I went outside to give him some fresh veggies, when, WHAM! The door slammed shut. Now wasn't that just great! I suspect Nick has something to do with this! Anyhow, I had to find a way to get in my house. I decided to tunnel down, deep into the earth. I dud and dug for three days and three nights, through the lithosphere, the asthenosphere, the mantle, and finally, I hit another surface. I poked my head out of the hole, and found myself in a strange and unearthly place. I had stumbled upon the Middle-Earth! This legendary place was home to a wide variaty of humanlike beings, like hobbits, elves, orcs, and goblins. Middle-Earth had been undetected by man due to its strange, inner crust. It remains in the center of the earth, so humans cannot find it. I met up with my good pal and all-around chum, GOLLUM. He was a nice young hobbit, with a good heart and a knack for strangling people. I said hello, and asked if he had seen my sock. He said that he had not. By gun! Why can't I ever find my sock?

An Observation

Live and Evil are spelled with the same letters.
Therefore, must we be Evil in order to Live?
Should we be Vile?
I bet Nick knows, but we all know he is under a Veil of lies.
That is all.

Tangerines vs. Lemons!

Last tuesday, I was having a fine conversation with my old freind Ivan the Farmer, when a stray albino hippo walked up to me and ate my hat. Now, that got me into a pretty bad mood. I mean, really, who wants to get their hat eaten by a hippo? Especially a hippo from Nevada! I mean, hippos don't even live in Nevada! Do they? I think not! Well, anyhow, I felt peckish for a clam salad with extra shoe oil, so I walked over to my Arch-Nemesis's house, the crazy Baron of the Blue Peaks. He was playing a round of Mini-Golf, and asked if I wanted to join in. I walked away, because under his words lurked a threat. I becha he really was planning to secretly steal my rare, collector's edition Lima Bean Action Figure I got last year at the American Break-Dancing Convention. My, it was a fine day. I had set the record for most Ninja Flips done in a Tye-Dye Tuxedo in 14.3 seconds. I made the Tye-Dye Tuxedo on my spare time while I was singing to my pet rock. It really sotthes the soul. Sometimes my pet rock sings back. Has that ever happened to you? I find it quite silly, especially when it is a thursday. I mean, who ever heared of a pet rock singing on a thursday? I guess you all have because I tould you. If I forget to tell you, just ask and I will tell it again. You may scoff, but within the realm of the nonexistence theory, there is no proof that my pet rock is not singing. I made up the nonexistence theory one day while I was eating 'tots and listening to my pet rock sing soothing music. I thought, if it is impossible to find an atom's speed and position, how do we know the atom is moving? How do we know it exists? There I realized that there is no proof that anything exists, but there is no proof that anything does not exist. We know nothing, nothing at all, except perhaps how to do Ninja Flips. Anyways, the 'tots I was eating turned out to be stale and I went to my orthodontist for help. He tould me to brush after meals, and I promised that I would, so I walked home and pulled out of my refrigerator a nice, fresh tangerine. But then I realized lemons were much cooler, so I did a silly dance while shouting for all the world to hear, "Snooglephres!"

The newest, rarest Magic Card in the world.

A Silly Tale

I am a Cowboy!

Hello, my mushy pals. Upon opening of a mysterious package upon my front door, I died. My soul then drifted up into the air, where I collided with Nick's nose. The powerful odor transformed my spirit into a duck. The duck waddled towards Toledo at a rate of 16 kilometer's per hour. The duck then walked into a farmer's market, where he purchased a photon cannon. The photon cannon blew up, and the duck was launched back into my body. I was alive again, but also a cowboy. I went to Texas to meet George Clooney. He autographed my purple tee shirt with a lemon-scented taco. Then I visited my uncle Hermie. Then George Clooney danced under the moon. The End.

OOH! A quick message from Lemons!

I forgot to tell all you people out there,
Snooglephres!
That is all.